Are You Failing Your Parents When They Need You Most?

Are you failing your parents when they need you most?

I know you’re busy with your life; your work, home, kids, etc., but if you haven’t circled back with your senior citizen aged parents about their life plans, it’s time to do so.

They might not even be aware they need you.  I’m not trying to be harsh, but I want to motivate anybody that hasn’t reached out to their elder parents to do so soon.

8 Signs Your Family Will Fight Over Your Estate

I understand we are all really busy with our own lives, but I’m asking you to pause and think about them and what their needs might be. Many of our parents have not done a great job with their retirement and estate planning.  They’re not likely to ask for your help, I suggest you initiate it.

Look out for your parents when they need you most.

My father died 21 years ago and his life and death had a huge impact on my life. My mother needs me and I stay actively involved in her life. I’m so grateful she and my father raised me well and gave me all their love and care.  She’s a very sharp, active woman that still works 3-4 days a week as a substitute school teacher.

Looking out for my mother while she has been on her own is at the top of my priority list.  Where does looking out for your parent’s fall on your priority list?

Communication is key. True, you’re a child, but you’re also an adult and at some point roles reverse and your parents need you to step up, although that may not admit it freely.

These days it is not unusual for many people to live 20 or more years beyond the normal retirement age. Unfortunately, as many seniors reach their eighties and nineties, plans that were satisfactory at age 65 may require a second look.

One area of special concern to many older seniors (as well as their adult-age children) is whether or not they will be able to continue to manage their assets. If they feel they can no longer handle these duties, they may wish to transfer this responsibility to others.

Better Alternative for Long-Term Care Insurance

A variety of arrangements are available to achieve this objective. Here are a few you may want to consider:

Revocable and Irrevocable Trusts. Seniors who want to retain control over their property while delegating responsibility for daily management to others may want to consider a revocable trust. This arrangement allows seniors to monitor the management of their assets, yet it offers the flexibility of changing the trust as experience and circumstances warrant. As added protection, a revocable trust can usually has a successor trustee that takes over the management should the parent not be capable. As an alternative, seniors who are willing to relinquish ownership of assets altogether could establish an irrevocable trust.

What Is a Revocable Living Trust?

Durable Power of Attorney – This mechanism allows seniors to appoint a trusted relative (usually spouse or adult child) or friend as a representative in legal and financial decision making. The powers granted, which may be broad or limited in scope, may vary from state to state. They remain in effect during disability or incompetence, although, in the event of incompetence, a guardian or conservator could revoke them. Some financial institutions are reluctant to recognize durable powers of attorney, so it is worthwhile to explore this possibility beforehand.

Power of Attorney Requirements in Illinois

I strongly recommend a serious illness fire drill. What if your parent had a stroke and needed you to take over? Would you know where to look for all their financial and legal documents? Where is their will and when was it last updated? Who’s their executor (the person in charge of carrying out the will). Do they have long-term care insurance? What about life insurance? Do they have a trust? 

IF YOU DON’T KNOW THESE ANSWERS YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE THE TALK.  

Many of us will see our parents over the coming holiday season. It may not be an easy topic to bring up, but you’ll regret it one day if you never do.

Regularly Review Plans – As seniors age, a periodic review of their financial arrangements should be made. In making the transition to later life stages, new needs and concerns may justify plan revisions. Seniors and their families should consult with their financial professionals and attorneys to help determine the best-suited strategies for their needs.

Income, tax and estate planning all need to be reviewed annually.

Work with Professionals – Make sure to meet with your parent’s estate planning attorney and financial adviser (Contact my firm for help).  They need to make sure the plans are up to date, accounts are titled correctly and beneficiaries are current.

Your parents took care of you when you needed them most. Now is the time for you to return the love and look after them.  Don’t expect them to ask for your help. Be proactive and inquire about their assets and ask to review their estate plan so that they can answer any questions you may have.

For those parents that have done a good job with their retirement and estate planning it’s another opportunity to learn from them. It’s also important to know what they have done so you will be prepared when needed.

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you want help in these areas.

https://www.lifeplanningtoday.com/time-to-make-a-difference/